Tuesday, December 14, 2010

The Smallest Decisions...

Most of you know that I sleep VERY well. I normally don't like to brag, but I am really REALLY good at it. I mean, yes, I sleep with ear plugs because I like complete silence when I drift off into my peaceful dreamworld. "Horizontal narcolepsy," is what my brother-in-law has named it. As soon as I am in a full horizontal position, I. Am. Out. That is, unless I have something on my mind.... not just something though, it takes more than just tomorrow's "to-do" list (I am not a mom yet, remember? my to-do list can change with the wind if I so desire... for the most part) or "did I remember to lock the door," to keep me from slumbering. You know, something like a boy, or in this case, WHAT I'M GOING TO DO WITH MY LIFE COME THIS SEPTEMBER.

This is a BIG decision... and I'm not particularly stressed about the actual decision itself, it's just my mind WILL NOT shut off when thinking about the endless possibilities. And it is SO annoying. I am trying not to rush into this decision as to carefully AND prayerfully start turning the page in this next chapter. But a few more nights of tossing and turning, may turn ugly for me. And nobody wants that. Trust me. A good friend of mine use to always say "CHALT" when making a decision.... And by that she meant never make a decision when you are Crazy (aka pms'ing and emotional), Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired. I think she stole that acronym from AA and added her own twist to it... I think it's supposed to be HALT when making decisions. The C is sooooo crucial. I like her version better. But I digress.... point is, if I don't start sleeping again, I'm going to be TIRED, CRANKY and ANGRY... probably lonely too because people generally don't like to be around people who are tired, cranky and angry.

All that being said, I am excited about what's up next! Even though I am not sure what that is going to entail. It could be anything from moving to Texas (I'm not buying my boots quite yet), to going back to school and starting a new career... there's a lot of middle ground there and it's a bit daunting at times. When I think about making the decision to "at least go interview" (with some prodding from Dad) for an asst coaching position at the Naval Academy and how taking that job altered my life's course, and the way it is STILL effecting it now, I am amazed. Saying yes to an interview seemed like such a miniscule decision at the time. But it wasn't. It was life changing. For so many different reasons. And all because I went to an interview for a job that I really didn't think I wanted. This post could easily morph into a "freedom of choice" vs "predestined" debate, but that would require way more time and brain cells than I can expend right now. So I'll save that for another day (maybe). If you're reading this post and are the praying type, I would not be opposed to you asking God to give me clarity, patience, diligence (there is lots to be done) and guidance, as I walk through this process. Oh and some SLEEP would be fab! Thanks everyone!

"Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that can change your life forever."
--Keri Russell

1 comment:

60 toes said...

lol, about the horizontal narcolepsy. I tell Adam he is like one of those dolls with eyes that close. When you lay it down, it goes to sleep. That is exactly how he is, it must run in the family.

You are onto something with the little decisions. Lots of little decision really do shape our lives, and of course there is God's providence. :) It is exciting to think of all of the options that are ahead of you, I trust God will show you the best path and you will follow.

Love you.