Day 12: A confession of sorts.
Since my decision to move out to Colorado was made, I've had more than a few people tell me how brave I am. How they could never do it... "quitting my job, moving so far away, and to a new place as well! It just adds to the courageousness of it all. Just plain scary." And I guess they're right. It CAN be scary to move. Change can be down right intimidating and terrifying, while being very necessary and good all at once. But what I think people are missing when they dote on me and proclaim me as this brave sojourner going West, is they didn't get to experience everything leading up to that point. The REASONS I'm uprooting myself and chasing after this crazy dream.
Truth is, here comes the confession, I'm just not that brave. Unfortunately, I am not 90% adventurer and 10% realist.... I'm quite the contrary actually. I like to think things through and logically plan most of my decisions. I take precautions and am proactive with things that involve a change in my livelyhood and well being. This decision was not a flipant flip of the wrist, like I was throwing a penny somewhere into a large wishing well. Oh, if it were only that simple.
It all started when I came back from Iraq... I've mentioned it before, but that's when my itchy feet syndrome started. And no, I don't mean athlete's foot. I heard a friend use that phrase before, and until I got back from Iraq I didn't fully comprehend it's meaning. But really it's just a witty way of saying, I was ready for some kind of move or change. I couldn't bare the thought of standing still and being in the same place doing the same thing for the next 15 years of my life, although I really did enjoy my job for the most part. Hence the "itchy feet." I didn't think (or want) that change to end me up in Colorado, but here is how the story of my so-called bravery goes....
..... to be continued (Day 13) :D